Circles of Love; re-exploring the concept.( Still pondering?? what to choose between love & hate !!).

Love is complete freedom…

The concept of the Unconditional Love is one of  the pure concepts, ultimately!!

Really!! 

And is it that easy to practice too?? We’ll explore these points in the write-up. Come and join me ☺️☺️

Life is a profound book. One must keep on learning, unlearning and relearning the concepts.

Afterall, Life is so much dynamic to be stagnant, isn’t it??

A casual talk was going on between Narmada and one of her friends; Gautam.

Gerenal and random things, they were talking about. somehow the conversation got diverted to the current scenario of frequent break-ups and prevailing dishonesty in relationships.

Gautam himself had few bad experiences and he mentioned about them, superficially.  Both of them agreed on one point, that ‘Love is complete freedom’. We don’t put bondages and restrictions on that person whom we love. If couples follow this idea of freedom and if they truly want their partners to be happy, there wouldn’t be need of being dishonest.

Narmada had been over confident about her concept of love that it’s very pure as she believes in complete dedication, mutual support in all the ups & downs of life and loving the person unconditionally, when it comes to commitment but yaa, she didn’t believe in random hook ups or getting physical before they are actually committed for the whole life.

But this time, she had to reconsider her opinion about live-in relationships when she came to know the views and feelings of Gautam about his ex-girlfriend.

The general tendency of people is that either they are in love/relationships or if the relationship has got over with a not so good ending (obviously), they start hating each-other.

No one can blame them either, as they are not committed anymore and obviously one of them would have had faced the darker side of such relationships. So, development of a feeling of hatred is considered to be common and normal. They don’t see each other anymore, don’t answer the phone calls etc etc. A sad and bitter ending, as it usually happens. In rare cases only, they can remain friends, after such break-ups.

Narmada had never been in any of such kind of relationships, but yes, she did have a general idea…based upon her observation of the surroundings. That the things are not so pleasant after such an incident and that such partners are almost dead for each other, after such a sad ending.

Now, she was actually astonished to hear Gautam’s opinion about his ex-girlfriend and when he almost sounded like a profound thinker,
when he said:

“I wanted her to be happy earlier… I want her to be happy now. just because she is not there with me, now, doesn’t mean that, I have to hate her. she was one of the most important persons in my life, at certain period of time… it was a lovely time, we had shared so much with each other at every level… I was deeply in love with her. I would always wish good for her, for me it doesn’t really matter, where and with whom she is now. Yes, earlier she was in the inner most circle of my heart and now she is in some other circle of my heart, which is a bit outer, but it doesn’t mean she is not there in my heart. Even if, due to certain reason we are not together now, but, how can I hate her!!?? I can’t. I just can’t.  Yes, sometimes, it hurts, it was very painful earlier too, when she took that decision but hating her won’t cure that pain, that’s existing… it would just amplify the pain and would impure my aura. So, I have choosen, the unconditional love. And when you love someone unconditionally, it doesn’t matter, what the other person has done, is doing or with whom he/she is. What really matters is that the person is free and is happy, where ever he/she is. Love is complete freedom, afterall… we can’t bind someone to stay with us. If we love someone we would really want that person to be happy. “

Hmm, Narmada was speechless at the moment, as she knew that, this was a pure concept of love, that Gautam was talking about. She found his point to be justifiable & admirable as she too could feel that, Gautam was actually in Love with his ex-gf. It wasn’t just attraction or infatuation, as generally happens at such young age, but, it was a true love.

How lucky that girl would have been, that she had such an open/broad minded partner, who actually and truly loved her. But, few things are not in our hands … so it wasn’t in their hands too.

The conversation with Gautam had a lite ending but it made Narmada to ponder over the whole concept again.

People say in general, that, they believe ‘love is freedom’ but, actually they don’t practice it. In the name of ‘Love’ what is generally practiced is putting bondages, keeping the other in lots of restrictions, no faith or trust is shown generally, there are exceptions to these things too in few relationships. In rare cases, we see the prevailing faith between the partners. These things give rise to dishonest practices by the other partner who is being judged on every act or is unable to feel the required trust/faith/love on him/her.

Such relationships may go on and on for years, when they had to, or in second case where they don’t have to drag it, one of them chooses to end it. Anyway, reasons can be many for whatever decision they take, to live together or to get separated.

So, what if, they choose to be separated. Normally the same thing, they get separation and are almost dead for each other, now. Some of them realise that they had never been in love, it was merely infatuation that brought them together and should have had taken some time before going ahead on the path of a relationship, but, it’s late for such realisations.

Actually, in many cases now a days, we see that they choose the so called relationship because they too want to enjoy the things, that their friends are enjoying, they don’t want to look the odd one out, where almost all of their friends are in relationships or sometimes, one of them has a thing in mind that it’s temporary not for always. Again reasons can be many to come together.

So, what after that??

When they choose to part ways??

If the overall circumstances are not so bad and you were in love with that person, you too can choose the path of unconditional love, as Gautam did. This doesn’t mean that you still have to show your love to the other person/ex-partner… it just means that you will keep your aura clean and clear. It was love for you, so it was love. You don’t need to change your feelings from love to hate. You just need to keep your aura and thought-process clear.

Sometimes,few are unable to decide for a longer period of time, as to what feelings should they choose for their ex  in such circumstances.

I would suggest to choose what you truly feel, what you actually want to choose without any outside/social pressure. Showing off something else and feeling something else, would only make the situation complicated. If you had choosen to be in a relationship, you can choose the right path, now also. The path that will lead to towards peace of mind and heart!! Because ultimately, what really matters is peace, love, affection, being with the one, we want to be with. Act wisely, before choosing your feelings. 

One must remember that it’s life, a real life which is highly unpredictable and miraculous. Sometimes, things don’t turn the way, we want it to be and it shows an entirely different path. The path must be explored before rejecting the idea of its being good for the one.

With lots of Love
Malvika @www.soultosoulvibes.in